Now that it’s been confirmed that Ghryswald is coming back to settle here, it’s time to fill him in on all the important stuff. The things we Australians know from oral history, and help us survive day to day life down under with relatively few scars to show for it.
Here’s a few to kick us off:
Drop Bears (Thylarctos plummetus):
They’re pretty cunning creatures, so you’ve got to keep a look out anytime you’re in wooded areas. However, there’s a few tell-tale signs when they’re about – until you learn to avoid them, a fairly solid hat of bike helmet is essential.
Unlike drop bears, you’ll be fairly safe from these in Queensland – they generally avoid heavily populated areas; that said, Queensland seems to be getting a lot of floods in recent years, so they may be washed out of their normal habitat and closer to the coast. They’re likely more scared of you than you are of them.
The letter ‘U’:
You may need to start using it in some words.
Part of the citizenship exam nowadays is that they’ll offer you a slice of Vegemite toast. You’ll be required to eat it, enjoy it, and extol its virtues to any foreigners.
There’s a few ones to start us off. What else will Ghrys need to know?Tweet this!